What to Tell the People Acting on Your Behalf

Anyone you have named to step in for you needs to know they have been selected. Ideally, this conversation happens before documents are signed so they can confirm they are willing to serve. If that did not happen, it is still very important to inform them afterward.

These individuals should know where your estate planning documents are stored. This prevents them from having to search your home or guess where paperwork might be located during an already difficult time.

They should also know who your key professional contacts are. This includes financial advisors, accountants, insurance professionals, and others who help manage your affairs. Having this information readily available allows them to act quickly and confidently if needed.

Another essential step is creating what many people call a treasure map. This is a clear record of where your assets are located. With so many accounts now managed electronically, it can be surprisingly difficult to identify everything without guidance. A written list can save your family countless hours and unnecessary expense.

For healthcare decision makers, communication is especially important. Documents can outline general wishes, but conversations provide clarity. Discuss your preferences for medical treatment, end of life care, and funeral or memorial wishes. This guidance can help them advocate for you with confidence.

If someone is acting under a power of attorney, they should also understand any regular gifting you want to continue if you become incapacitated. This might include charitable giving or ongoing support for family members.

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What to Tell Your Broader Family

Talking with your family at large is a personal choice, but in many cases it can be helpful. These conversations can provide context and reduce misunderstandings later.

If you made unequal gifts during your lifetime, it may be helpful to explain why. For example, one child may have received additional support during a difficult period, which affects how assets are divided later. Explaining these decisions ahead of time can reduce resentment and confusion.

Family discussions can also be useful when it comes to sentimental items. Often, disagreements arise over personal possessions rather than money. Talking about who values certain items and documenting those wishes can preserve family harmony.

Pets are another topic worth addressing. If you have animals, let your family know who will care for them and whether funds are set aside for that purpose.

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Key Information to Share

While every family is different, most estate plans benefit from sharing the following information with the appropriate people:

• Where your estate planning documents are stored
• Who is named to act on your behalf and in what roles
• A list of key professional contacts
• A clear overview of where assets are located
• Important medical and end of life preferences
• Plans for pets and sentimental belongings

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Frequently Asked Questions

Do I need to tell everyone the details of my estate plan?
No. You can choose how much to share and with whom. At a minimum, people acting on your behalf should know their roles and where documents are stored.

Should I give my family copies of my documents?
Not always. It is often enough to tell them where the originals are kept and how to access them when needed.

What if I am worried these conversations will cause conflict?
Handled thoughtfully, these discussions often reduce conflict rather than create it. Clear explanations can prevent surprises and misunderstandings later.

Author

Claire creates wills and trusts which provide security and peace of mind. She compassionately listens to her clients’ dreams, goals, and fears and then fashions plans that best meet their needs. It is important to Claire that her clients understand different options and make decisions that are right for them. She loves to educate clients by drawing out complicated concepts.

Come visit us! Conveniently located in Rochester, Minnesota.